The UK's first LGBT+ retirement community comes to Vauxhall

CASESTUDIES FROM THE USA

Neighbours Barb Chase, 69 and Nan Kelly, 66 moved into Village Hearth, last autumn, an LGBT+ affirming cohousing scheme in Durham, North Carolina.

Barb: “This time we have here is a very precious sliver of life, for this period there's a lot of people who say, hell no I'm not going back in the closet, screw that!

“I've worked in male dominated corporate settings all of my life and been very closeted, those of us who are retiring, we bring a lot of that repressed baggage with us. So it's vital to have a whole environment that's affirming, not just staff and neighbours but the entire culture of that environment, because this sliver of life will pass us in a New York minute.

"A lot of this has to do with human dignity, and the vital importance to the soul of preserving dignity.

"We live on a lane that we call Lesbian Lane. But we've acknowledged that if a straight couple were to move in we would change the name to Lavender Lane, out of respect! We are so out that we can have fun and when you have fun you release endorphins, and when you release endorphins, you stay young. So that's the joy."

Nan: “A big part of forming cohousing is where the intention is living safely, openly and with other people who are LGBT, so we really have a community who feel safe and affirmed."

Nan: “I experienced discrimination and I lived in Maine, which was the very first state to have a popular referendum for legal marriage, so it’s one of the more progressive states.

"However, in the town I lived my house had eggs thrown at it, I was yelled at by people on the street, called names. Here, my wife and I can sit on the porch and hug and kiss and nobody blinks an eye.

"You don't even think about who's looking, who am I going to offend. We can hold hands, dance.

"That’s one of the real joys of living in this community, the ability to have the same sort of relationship 90% of the country feels without even thinking.

"Like do you ever recognise there's oxygen in the room? It's just there its implicit, and there's implicit homophobia all over the place."

Elizabeth Coffey-William, 73, has been a resident of John C Anderson LGBT friendly apartments since it opened six years ago. The building was set up by Mark Segal, one of the original founders of the Gay Liberation Front.

"The folks who were there so long ago who fought in the face of great adversity in whatever way they had available to them, they helped to create the LGBT movement that is thriving today.

"And Mark Segal’s vision was, well now these people are of a certain age and many of them don't have anywhere acceptable to live. And they deserve that.

"I want it too because we're everywhere, and always have been.

"And he was adamant he didn't just want a place to house people, he wanted a place where we could create community."

"There is just something extraordinary unhealthy about being forced or intimidated into living a less than authentic life, especially at this time in our lives because most of us are still very engaged and I want to be who I am.

"I transitioned 49 years ago so I've always been who I am since I was a teenager and I couldn't go back into a closet even if they wanted me to, I don't know how."

"There are all these delightfully quirky and unassuming characters who have amazing history and that adds to the richness of the building. But then at the end of the day, we're just all friends and neighbours and there's a richness to that.

"We are allowed and encouraged to be exactly who we have always been, and if you're not, if you're discouraged to live in your authenticity, you're going to wither."